A Smashing Adventure
by Ian Jenkins
Summary: A young man from Earth is dropped into the Super Smash Bros. Melee Tournament and unintentionally faces off with Zelda!


A Smashing Adventure  
By Kronos Recker  
  
Part 1 - A New Challenger Has Entered The Area!  
  
Slowly, the hazy darkness drifted away from Ian's eyes and everything was brought into focus. He groaned lightly from the pain in his body and slowly sat up. As his eyes took in his surroundings, he was pretty sure he was no longer in his room...or anywhere in his home, for that matter. In fact, he didn't even think he was on his own world...unless his world consisted of a ruined temple area with a castle in the distance. Slowly, he got to his feet and looked about, taking everything in. Yeah, he was pretty sure he wasn't in New York any longer. Quickly, he pinched himself and groaned. This wasn't a dream, either. This was completely real.  
  
"Hello?" he called out, hearing his voice echo, "...is anybody here?"  
  
Footsteps echoed behind him and he turned quickly. Standing there was one of the most beautiful women that he had ever seen in his life. She wore a pink and white dress, with a symbol of three golden triangles near the waistline. In her equally golden hair, she wore a tiara, which was held in place by her elven ears. Ian tried not to stare but couldn't keep his jaw from hanging open in realization.  
  
"Y-you're...Princess Zelda!" he exclaimed, still not believing his eyes.  
  
Zelda stared at the young man for a moment and cocked her head to the side. She had never heard a combatant speak during a fight, unless it was a taunt. This one didn't seem to be taunting her or insulting her. He actually just seemed surprised to see her at all! He didn't look like any of the other combatants, either, dressed in those short pants and that strange-looking button down shirt with the palm trees. Something told her that he wasn't one of the normal combatants. Repressing a sigh, she reminded herself that in the SSB Tournament, there are no allies - only enemies, which this young man would soon find out.  
  
"I am..." she replied, "...why do you look so surprised?"  
  
"I just... I've never seen you in person before..." he said in an astonished voice, "Where did you come from?"  
  
She shook her head gently, "We can talk after the match, all right...? Come on, now. Defend yourself!"  
  
Ian quirked an eyebrow, "Defend myself? What are you ta-" That was as far as he got before Zelda got a good shot in, causing him to sail back and smack into a pillar. He groaned as he slid down to the floor. His vision was blurry with haze as he stood and stared at Zelda, "What in the hell are you DOING? What did I do!?"  
  
Zelda stared at him, shaking her head again, "Hm... I suppose you really aren't a competitor."  
  
"Competitor?" he asked, eyebrow quirking, "...Competitor in what?"  
  
"The SSBM Tournament, of course." She replied with a hint of surprise in her voice, "...why else would you be here?"  
  
Ian stared at her for a long time. Oh, man... this was just great... but... it was impossible! Completely! This couldn't be real... but it couldn't be a dream, either. He felt the impact of Zelda's fist and the impact against the pillar, too. The initials... SSBM. He knew he had heard them before. And this scenery, too, was familiar to his eyes. He couldn't put his finger on it, though.  
  
"Look..." Zelda said with a sigh, "Whether you are competing or not in the tournament, you came here and must be defeated in order for the tournament to continue. Are you going to attack me or not? If you won't, I'm going to have to defeat you."  
  
Oh, great bloody crap. That wasn't what he needed to hear at all. Zelda was going to kill him, just to keep some stupid tournament going. Well, he wasn't going to sit around for that! There was one thing that was nagging him, though.  
  
"I...can't." he sighed, "I can't hit women...let alone a princess."  
  
Zelda stared at him for a moment and then nodded, "Very well, then. You may go."  
  
Ian blinked. She was just going to let him go? Just like that? he thought, He bowed respectfully to her and turned, heading away from the ruined temple. Suddenly, something crossed his mind. How was he going to leave? He had no way of knowing where the exit was. Turning back, he opened his mouth to ask Zelda where it was. She was gone. Without a trace. Vanished. He raised an eyebrow at her departure but he simply shrugged and turned to leave. He was then face-to-face with a young man in a ninja-like outfit with blonde hair covering one eye. He gasped. Sheik. "What's the meaning of this?" he sputtered.  
  
"You said you couldn't fight a woman." He replied, "Better?" With that, he sent a kick straight into Ian's face, sending him back the way he came. He tumbled down the stairs and landed against a broken column.  
  
Ian probably used every curse word in the English language as he tried to stand. What was his/her problem!? What was the big deal about this tournament!? If he didn't do something fast, he'd be killed off by a freakin' video game character. He got to his feet and turned to look at Sheik. He was still standing where he was before. That son of a carpet salesman... He'd show him.  
  
Sheik sighed as the hotheaded young man charged at him. He WASN'T a competitor. Still, he took the risk to come. He had to pay the consequences. Taking a step back, he gathered darts into his hand. One after another...then two after two...then three after three and so on. He felt pity for the poor waif, who had seemingly gotten into something he wasn't prepared for. So... he decided he would make it quick. The young man looked ready to slam a fist straight into Sheik's face when the Sheikah unleashed the fully fury of his poison darts into Ian's body.  
  
Ian had already swung at Sheik but when the poison darts hit his body, he keeled over and missed by a long shot, stumbling forward. Already, breathing was seemingly difficult. Sheik moved quickly to catch him before he could fall. Ian's eyes were wide, alert, and frantic. "...Sheik..." he uttered, "...why? ...What is this all about? ...I didn't mean to intrude on this tournament..." He coughed away from Sheik's face. He could hardly believe it. He was killing him... those darts had done the damage.  
  
Sheik brought Ian's arm behind his neck, giving him support as he guided the young man to the end of the fighting ground. Down the stairs, over the broken column, and under and arch with the smaller pillars. As he did so, he shifted back into Princess Zelda and regarded Ian with a look of pity. The young man's wide eyes grew wider as he saw her again. "I'm going to make this as quick as possible, if you'd just cooperate with me..." she said in her quiet voice.  
  
Ian nodded lightly. It was all he could do. He couldn't speak, probably an effect of the poison in Sheik's darts. She stood him on the edge of the precipice against a pillar, giving him and intimidating view of the world below. As he gazed down, he suddenly felt a cold wind send a chill down his spine. Why did she bring him to this spot? Was it so...? Oh, no... no! NO! He turned around just as Zelda put a hand on his shoulder.  
  
"We'll talk when you've recovered, ok?" she said with a sweet smile. With that, she gave a light shove. But it was enough to send him over the edge. Ian did the first thing that came to mind. He grabbed the edge of the precipice, trying to hold on for dear life. Zelda stared down at him and shook her head. Still, he didn't understand that it had to happen. He stared up at her eyes, pleading with her. She just stared back at him. For a fleeting moment, he looked down, at the void. It looked so deep. All at once, he felt something on his hand. He looked up to see Zelda's foot settled on it. His eyes widened. Before he could do anything else, she stomped down viciously on his hand. He recoiled and lost his grip, hurtling down...down...down... into the endless void that awaited him. There was a flash of white and then everything went dark. 


End file.
